I don’t know when I last wrote in this diary, a while ago I am sure! I have been terribly busy, all good stuff, but lots to do.
After marching in last weeks Secular Europe campaign, I felt like I had been run over by a bus! But I have just about recovered, and it was so worth it. How nice it is to be with people of passion and integrity! Lots of hugs and warm words, just like being given another tankful of petrol for the next bit of the journey!
I was honoured to be asked to speak at both Secular Europe Conference and the Rally the following week. I was so pleased that everyone gets the idea of being a Survivor rather than a victim!
I thought a lot about it all week, and what being a “survivor” means to me.
Last year when I met my “new family” the fellow survivors from Verona, I cried all day because of their bravery. Their stories were horrendous, yes, but what made me want to fight for them ,and be with them, was their strength, their dignity and their amazing sense of humour!
I want to be like them!
A few years ago I went with my husband to an art exhibition, where there were some disabled artists demonstrating.There was one delightful young woman with no legs or arms, who was painting a wonderful picture with her mouth. I stood behind her watching her work, and noticed how the muscles in her neck were very developed and constantly working.I asked her if her neck got sore? She said that it certainly did, but she had regular massages on it to keep it in good condition, because it was so crucial for her . I had been choking back tears all day, and rather lamely I said “I think you are terribly brave” and she said “No I am not brave , you just have to work with what you’ve got!”
I want to be like her!
I have just been to Durham for two days teaching and while I was in my hotel room watching television I watched some disabled servicemen embarking on a bike ride from one end of the country to the other in aid of injured servicemen and women. One of them had no legs, the other no arms.They were in high sprits, laughing and joking and teasing each other, excited about their journey and thinking of how many people would be helped.
I want to be like them!
My friend and colleague, Krish, who is a doctor in the military told me on Tuesday that there is a saying in the military after someone has been injured, “OK dry your eyes now Princess-crack on!”
I want to do that!!!
Now, I can wear my abuses like a badge, I can carry that burden and allow it to drag me down, I can excuse any bad behaviour because of my “damage” I can probably get a lot of sympathy. I am quite sure the catholic church would be happy for us all to be “victims” — damaged, disempowered, and afraid. That way the narcissistic tyrannical regime that they are can win! If we are disempowered, and downtrodden, they need not fear having to account for their crimes or their lack of compassion.
So I have a choice – I can talk a good talk or I can really walk the walk!
I can get off my backside, dry my eyes (Princess) and crack on!
I want to be a survivor!
Thank you all for helping me grow
Sue XX
